3 Great Networking Tips
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Three tips to make networking better for you, more effective, and to suck less.
Some people love networking, some hate it. Regardless of your experience or relationship with networking here are three tips that will make it a better experience for you and others.
Number 1: Don’t make it about YOU.
A lot of people go to networking with the mindset of needing to have their sales pitch ready and being focused on talking about themselves and saying just the right thing in order to earn some business, etc.
That's why networking events can feel super cringy. Nobody wants to be pitched to or sold something. Also, I often find that people who are nervous about networking feel anxious because they think they have to perform well and impress people or else they won't be successful in getting people interested in whatever they’re offering.
“Go to network with the intention of genuinely building relationships and to simply connect with people. ”
The very useful shift here is to not make it all about you. Go to network with the intention of genuinely building relationships and to simply connect with people.
If that is honestly your goal versus going to sell yourself or your stuff to people, you will create a better experience for you and for others. People will gravitate to you as opposed to feeling like “This person is just here to sell to me.” It also takes the pressure off of you feeling like you have to be “on.” Just go to meet people, connect, and learn about them. Make it about sincere connection.
Number 2: Be curious.
Be genuinely interested in other people as opposed to just waiting for your turn to talk. When people are networking and only interested in talking about themselves or waiting for their turn to speak you can feel it, and it feels kind of gross and like a lack of self awareness.
Genuinely ask questions of people; be curious, be interested in what they do and how they got into it, and how they feel about it. Also, connect about things that have nothing at all to do with work.
“It’s nice to have a couple questions in your pocket that are like a little bit outside the norm.”
It's nice to have a couple questions in your pocket that are a little bit outside the norm. They shouldn’t be too corny or weird or overly personal, but insightful or fun. One that I like is “What lights you up the most about the work that you do?” I like that question because I like to see people getting to talk about what they love or are excited about.
Have one or two or three specific questions that you like to ask people. That can be really helpful for when there is a lull in the conversation or you find yourself trying to think of something to talk about.
Be curious and genuinely interested in other people and learning about them. This takes a lot of pressure off of you feeling like you need to perform or impress.
Number 3) Avoid getting stuck in a conversation.
If you've ever networked then you know that this can happen. Getting stuck in a conversation for too long and not being able to get out of it. Wanting to excuse yourself from a conversation but being too polite to leave is real.
“Wanting to excuse yourself from a conversation but being too polite to leave is real.”
A really great tip that I heard and love and want to pass along (for the record, I didn’t come up with this. I heard it from someone else and tried to research where it came from originally and was unable to find the source). It’s a gentle and effective way to get out of and move on from conversations.
The suggestion is to say, “Hey, really quick before I go,” and then say something positive, like pay them a compliment or remark about something they shared with you. That could be “Hey, really quick before I go, thanks for sharing that with me, it was great to learn about you and to connect with you.”
It’s helpful to announce your departure, and also leave on a positive note.
Number 3 (Part B): A rule about compliments.
This is a personal rule that I follow and I think it’s very helpful. If I am giving a compliment to someone that isn’t about what they shared with me, I will only pay a compliment about something that they chose.
So for example, their shoes, or their glasses frames, or the color of their jacket. I never give compliments about something that they didn’t choose, like for example the color of their eyes or their height. Paying a compliment to someone about their physical appearance if it’s not something they chose can potentially be super awkward and uncomfortable.
“Paying a compliment to someone about their physical appearance if it’s not something they chose can potentially be super awkward and uncomfortable.”
I think this is something that men especially need to be aware of and avoid because it could potentially make someone feel uncomfortable. It can feel like it’s too personal or it may feel like crossing a line and give the impression of hitting on someone. Like it or not, whether that is the intention or not, it’s best to avoid. Networking is not an appropriate place for that and anything that can potentially make someone else feel uncomfortable is best to steer clear from altogether.
Short and sweet wrap up.
Don’t make everything all about you. Be genuinely curious about other people, not just waiting for your turn to speak. And if you need to bounce from a conversation, announce your departure and leave with a sincere compliment. Easy peasy.
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This article was created by Galen Emanuele for the #culturedrop. Free leadership and team culture content in less than 5 minutes a week. Check out the rest of this month's content and subscribe to the Culture Drop at https://bit.ly/culturedrop
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